How to have the relationship talk. Remind yourself that asking for what you want is acceptable and beneficial. “Remind yourself that it’s acceptable to request the things in life you want, whether they be a promotion or the particular kind of relationship you desire. The worst-case scenario is that the other individual declines. If they do decline, the information they provide will enable you to proceed in the most advantageous way possible, says Hendrix.
How to have the relationship talk Do not be scared to frighten them away.
There is nothing you can do or ask to make this person leave if they are the one you are meant to be with. Nothing will be able to keep them away if it is ‘your person,’ claims Hendrix.
Face-to-face communication should be used.
Chiara Atik, dating expert and author of Modern Dating: A Field Guide, advises against having uncomfortable conversations over the phone or over text messages. “This kind of communication is just too confusing for texting, and phone calls are simply not the same as face-to-face meetings. The absolute greatest approach to start things off in a relationship is by having a mature conversation in person.
Avoid opening the conversation with “We need to talk.”
The four words “we need to talk” are among the most tense-inducing in the English language. Always stay away from them. The phrase “we need to talk” will instantly send someone into a panic, advises Los Angeles-based relationship and dating expert Lisa Shield.
If you’re anxious, be honest about it.
It’s acceptable to feel anxious about the chat and what it signifies. It’s normal, and your prospective spouse is likely experiencing the same thing. Some people are less terrified of commitment than they are of making the incorrect choice. You can be up front and admit that you aren’t certain they are the one but that you think it’s worthwhile to find out.
Make it brief! Even though the topic is important, the dialogue need not be.
According to Andrea Syrtash, dating expert and author of He’s Just Not Your Type (and That’s a Good Thing), “The talk shouldn’t be heavy and pressure-filled.” “You can let them know in a lighthearted and enjoyable approach if you want to let them know that you see greater potential in them. You may say something like, “I’m not looking for dates anymore.” I removed my profile with joy today. That might start a discussion. They might reply, “Why would you do that?” That is probably a clue they aren’t ready: “Don’t do that!” The talk will be lot easier if they grinned and acknowledged that they had done the same.
How to have the relationship talk Adopt a direct tone.
It’s better for both of you if you are direct and clear, so resist the impulse to have a lengthy discussion or explanation of your feelings. Because How would you respond? Hendrix offers the following example of how to approach the subject with assurance and clarity:
“Hey. Over the past few months, I’ve truly enjoyed getting to know you and spending time with you. I want to take the relationship to the next level, so I’m seeking for someone who is willing to do the same, in order to manage expectations. Because Are you also seeking for something like this? Do you see anything like this happening to us? What may that appear to you to be like?
Allow the person some time to reflect.
Because It’s acceptable if your potential partner doesn’t respond to you straight away! Shield asserts that the issue need not be fixed immediately. Because You’re merely sowing a seed. Going back and asking, “Have you given any thought to what we discussed the other day? “is how you have a follow-up.
If the conversation doesn’t go as you had hoped, don’t give up.
Because Don’t be scared to move on if you have the “what are we” discussion with someone and it becomes clear that they don’t desire a committed relationship. Don’t give in. Continue seeking for the ideal partner who is prepared to make the commitment you want.
Because “If you and the other person are not on the same page, give yourself a high five for being a brave superhero and asking for what you want. Keep in mind that it has nothing to do with you if someone else doesn’t want what you do. Because Don’t immediately blame yourself because there are numerous other reasons why someone could not be on the same page as you, advises Hendrix.
How to have the relationship talk Choose between leaving or sticking it out.
Now that you are in control, you must choose whether to wait it out or walk away. “In order to make room for what we do want, we occasionally have to say no to things we don’t want in life. If you decide to leave, give yourself some time to mourn the relationship, connection, and fantasies you once had. Give yourself a tonne of grace for how difficult it was to leave. Increase your self-care. Because “To stay balanced, your self-care must increase in tandem with your stress level,” advises Hendrix.