If you are wondering “how to deal with an avoider” you are not alone. This article discusses the three main coping mechanisms for avoiders: Empathy, Reliability and Removing the need for one person. One of these methods will work for you keep that in mind. Alternatively, you may wish to consider one of the other two approaches. Either way, it is imperative to know your own limitations, and avoid being the one to decide which is the best option.
How to Deal With an Avoider – Avoidance coping
If you’re dealing with an avoider, one of the most helpful things you can do is make yourself aware of the times when you tend to run away from problems. Perhaps you procrastinate too much or simply avoid talking about problems. Whatever the case may be, it can be helpful to write down these times so you can notice them in the future. This is an important step in stopping avoidance coping, because once you know how and when it happens, you’ll be more able to control it and change your habits.
Another common avoidance coping is avoiding things that trigger painful memories. This can include asking for help in class or going to a professor’s office hours. Other people might try to encourage you to engage in a new activity, but avoid approaching difficult conversations for fear of being observed. Sometimes a friend is all you need to help you break the cycle of avoidance and make you take action. Despite the difficulties and obstacles that may come your way, if you can overcome this coping strategy and get out into the world, you can start feeling more confident and happier about yourself.
Research has shown that the use of avoidance coping is associated with higher levels of acute and chronic stress, and is not associated with improved mental health. Moreover, this method reinforces self-doubt, undermines self-confidence, and is linked to higher rates of depressive symptoms. Avoidance coping, therefore, is a bad choice and should be avoided when possible. It is not only detrimental to your mental health, but also to your child’s life and well-being.
How to Deal With an Avoider – Empathy
Developing empathy in others can be difficult, but it is a skill that is well worth developing. Empathy is an important part of being a good person, and it encourages helpful behaviors. Empathy can also breed evil. Here are some tips to develop empathy in others. First, find out what they fear and how you can help them. Once you know this, you can begin identifying ways to show empathy to them.
It is easy to become emotionally burned out or avoid relating to others’ problems. Empathy can be costly, however. It takes time, energy, and emotional weight to show genuine concern for others. Practice empathy by observing body language and nonverbal cues, such as changes in their habits. Using these techniques can help you to understand why they avoid you. Developing empathy can be difficult for some, but it is essential to be patient and understanding.
Empathy is an important trait in humans. It is as necessary for relationships as breathing and taste. According to noted psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut, empathy is as basic as our other senses. Lack of empathy impedes our psychological well-being. A person who lacks empathy does not want to be known. And if you are able to show empathy, you are on the right track.
Relying on one person
Relying on one person to deal with the symptoms of avoidance is a recipe for disaster. This strategy often results in dependency and makes it impossible to break free from avoidance behaviors. It may help to have a trusted friend or family member there for support, but eventually you will want to step into your previous avoidances alone. Your loved ones can offer you support from a distance, but you must move forward on your own to overcome the avoidance behaviors.